I have this belief: special needs kids have parents with special needs. While I’m at it, I also believe that all kids have special needs. What I notice is that particularly when those special needs come into play, we focus heavily on the child but not on the parents. Kids go see doctors, psychologist and psychotherapist to address health concerns. development and behavioral disorders… while their parents are... doing the very best they can.
In coaching, we discuss very openly and confidentially your attitudes towards your children and their behaviors. We aren’t limited to that either – we can talk about your attitudes and concerns with your spouse, career, parents, friends, your self-image whatever comes to mind and wherever the conversation needs to go because what we are really after is personal discovery. What are your behaviors, attitudes and core beliefs that impact your way of being in the world (which is also your way of being with your family right?). We work on building you up to a state of resilience so you can be the best possible version of yourself. This tends to inspire those around you to be the best versions of themselves. Including your kids.
How does this help your kids?
First, you’ll “show up” to your kids differently. Maybe it’s confidence, or peace, or wisdom you’re shooting for – whatever it is, your kids (and more) will benefit from seeing that in you.
Second, it will change the way you talk about things like your emotions, your values, your fears. When you can speak more authentically about your experience you can apply that to your conversation with your kids, and your spouse (and in all of your relationships).
Third, in coaching, you develop tools and strategies (we call them practices) in your development journey that you may choose to share with your children. I have had some clients begin dancing with their children. Others did journaling work with their kids. I teach my kids various “tricks” to get them to breathe deeply when they’re feeling out of control. When we engage our children in or learning process we teach them that we value learning (life long), that we are learners too, and that there are ways that they will be teaching us (kids are often much better at adopting new practices than adults).